Every Moment Many Choices

(The following is dedicated to someone close to me that made a bad choice. Fortunately, the results of his actions are not disastrous. However, I pray that the experience can be an opportunity to awaken even slightly and not the beginning of a pattern which could lead to an unfortunate future.)

At every moment we are constantly making choices. Our choices define the direction of our lives.

Repeated choices can quickly become a habit.

Let us say that sometime in your life, you began to act outrageously in order to gain attention. It might be how you dress, how you talk, what you do.

The outrageous behavior gains you attention. Before long many friends and acquaintances begin defining you based on this outrageous behavior. When the “crazy” plans hatch, you are the one that everyone brings in. When something happens, you are the one that everyone looks to first.

While I can say that you always have the ability to change because you have the ability to make different choices, its hard to believe. The most common response is something like “Well, I can’t help it. That is who I am.”

I am telling you that this is not you!

These are your habits. Your habits are not you!

You can have good habits. You can have bad habits. What you chose to do and what you chose to repeat are what become your habits. Before you know it your habitual patterns are controlling you. Stop before its too late!

Khenpo Choga Rinpoche has said that anything repeated becomes a habit. If you repeatedly get angry, you will soon become regarded as an angry person. If you are continually helpful, you will become a kind and helpful person. Looking back, at one time you were not likely an angry person but over time, one moment after another you became an a person who got angry. Now the habit controls you.

Within Buddhism, we slowly but surely begin to become aware of our thoughts. We begin to watch how we “automatically” react to situations. We first train in becoming aware of the emotions and thoughts as they occur. We train our awareness so that we can avoid reacting based on our habitual patterns.

Later we begin to work on removing the auto-reactions all together. Within Buddhism, even the initial reaction, the seemingly automatic response to a situation whether it be fear, disgust, anger, anxiety, etc. are looked upon as habits as well.

So what are we to do? First start paying attention to your thinking and emotions. Watch your immediate response to a situation. Don’t act on your emotions. Don’t automatically do what comes naturally. It is likely a habit

You want to become aware of your automatic reaction to situations. Then, at the very least, stop before you transition from the emotional response into negative action. Create a break. Stop before you act.

Second, consider the benefit of small changes in your thinking and choices. Take a distant view of your actions. It is like looking through a telescope. At the eye-piece, you might make a fractional alteration of its position. However, what you are now looking at, way out in space, is million of miles away from the previous trajectory.

Small changes in our choices can make big changes in our future.

If you make a bad choice in life. Then take action immediately to correct. Whatever you do, don’t repeat it. Don’t turn a bad choice into a bad habit. It’s a lot easier to modify your behavior before it becomes a habit.

Please take note. Before its too late!

May you be free from suffering. May you find unchangeable happiness and the causes of true happiness. I send my love to you.

Many Dharma Blessings,

Geoff