Giving up the Comforts of Home

37 Practices of a Bodhisattva Number 2

“Remaining too long in one place, our attraction to loved ones upsets us,
We are tossed in its wake.
The flames of our anger towards those who annoy us consume what good merit we have gained in the past.
The darkness of closed-minded thinking dims our outlook,
We lose vivid sight of what’s right and what’s wrong.
We must give up our home and set forth from our country-
The sons of the Buddhas all practice this way.”

It is important for us to remember that the stages of practice go from that which is focused on entering the path, which always begins with renunciation. Eventually we move on to more subtle obstacles including thoughts as they arise. But first one needs to work the big issues.

So where in the first stanza, we told to study, contemplate, and meditate on the Dharma, here we are advised to leave our homes and the environments, which can most easily cause negative emotions to arise.

He breaks down the difficulties which arise into the traditional three poison: desire/attachment; anger/hatred, and ignorance/wrong understanding. Remaining with our loved ones puts us close to objects of desire and attachment. Remaining in our town puts us close to those who might be the objects of anger and frustration. The comforts and familiarity of our home towns can result in closed-mind thinking just by its nature of being familiar and normal.

It is for this reason that Gyalse Togme states that we must leave our homes. His advice is rather harsh on those of us choosing the path of a Bodhisattva.

More often than not, writers on this stanza like to soften what has been said.
Khenpo Sonam told us in a retreat that it means exactly what is said. Leave your home needs to be done according to the author. However, Khenpo Sonam also said that he did not necessary agree with this being mandatory in order to progress along the Path.

In such a case, we can attempt to do the best that we can. Retreats away from your home are a temporary way. Letting go of our attachments is another approach. The intent is to give the objects/people, which become the conditions for negative emotions.

Buddhism is not about fundamental rules. Just because one teacher advises his students to follow a certain instruction, does not mean that everyone who is Buddhist should follow such an instruction 800 years later.

It is helpful to note that author studied under the Kadampa masters who insisted on living a strict monastic life. The Nyingma schools, in general, never accepted this. I personally admire teachers who lived part of the world including having a wife, children, and homes. This includes Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche, Dudjom Rinpoche, and Chatral Rinpoche.

This is not meant as an apology. I can overlook the strict nature of this stanza. For me, I might agree that leaving everything behind is the best and likely the most expedient approach, but I will follow my teachers who have told me that it is not the only approach.

Mentally letting go, for me is necessary. Physically leaving is optional.

Many Dharma Blessings,

Geoff